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The disadvantages of riding side-saddle? The main one is that I don’t present a streamilned profile on the scooter. (Not that I do off it either – what with all the assorted bulges I’ve acquired over the last few years.) But the point is that my feet and knees stick out at right angles. Hubby, blissfully unaware, regularly drives too close to walls and I narrowly escape dislocating my patellae or, at minimum, badly grazed knees.
Argh! There’s a fast approaching SUV, its wheels looking uncomfortably like spinning silver scythes. Quick! I have a split second to adopt the insouciant expression and elegant pointy toe posture of a Degas ballerina. Double argh! My face contorts in horror and my feet twist outward in a most ungainly fashion. Snap, crackle, pop! That not my breakfast cereal digesting but… I look down – I’ve escaped traumatic amputation of my forefeet by the proverbial whisker, but the twisted ankles? Nothing a good orthopedist can’t fix.
Hubby isn’t too happy about the newly adopted seating arrangement – he complains I now take up way too much space – (“Why don’t you lie down comfortably? I’ll stand and drive,” he offers with more than a trace of sarcasm in his voice) - but we’re both saddled with it for the time being.
© Sosha Srinivasan
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